Audiences of...one to none.

Today started out a little differently than usually. First of all we had to be to church earlier than usual to open up for a guest musician, Marvin Mumford and his 11 yr. old son who rocks on the drums (btw, his worship is a completely different style from the music on his website, marvinmumford.com). After church we walked across the street to the conveniently placed Wendy's across the street (the walk makes up for the calories, right?)

It was awesome to hang out and be exhorted by a guy who use to co-lead worship for what could be called a mega-church; a guy who now ministers mainly to small, little churches like us. What happened? Well, the Lord challenged him through a friend..."so, if someone invited you to a home bible study to play, would you do it?" Hmmmm.... And with the Yes, a new career launched. The mega-church lost a worship leader, but the little guys who can't afford people who need stages and have riders gained big-time.

"It's just like wives are exhorted to love their husbands as unto the Lord," he told us over cheesburgers. "I need to worship as unto the Lord and not worry about numbers."

Our little church has only been around a year-and-a-half. And starting a church can be awkward. You invite people, and they come to visit, just to be the only person there that day. "Ooooh...how could they ever come back?" you wonder. Or no one new comes for several weeks in a row. Or some of the regulars just disappear. Poof. Gone.

Church planters have a lot of room for pride. Because it's all about you...right? How friendly you are... How well you dress.... How...fill in the blank... But here's the deal, that's pride...because those issues make it all about you, and not that audience of one.

As Marvin exhorted us, As unto the Lord. There's the balance. We need to do our preparation with excellence, whether creating a great room for worship each week, having worship ready, kids ministry ready, etc. All of it, unto the Lord. Period.

I so needed that refreshing reminder today. And every day.

From fullness of dirt to joy

In the presence of God, there is fullness of joy. That is what David wrote in Psalm 16:11. To be perfectly honest, joy has not been part of my life for a long time. I feel overwhelmed by the very things that are given as blessings. The children who are my constant companions with constant needs. The beautiful home that is covered by the end of each day with a mixture of toys, shoes, dust, dirt and footprints. The clothing piled up and needing attention. The dog I should be walking. The yard I should be weeding. The car that needs fresh oil and rotated tires.

I think that in my presence there is fullness of dirt. and decay. and even despair. But Joy...where is it? In the presence of God.

My husband just kicked off a little project called 100 Days of Summer with our church body. Basically we all get to read our way through 100 essential portions of the bible, skipping things like genealogies, in 100 days. We're doing it together, and more importantly we're doing it daily. As the pastor's wife, I not only get to join in, I really have to. And I'm glad to. I have quiet time...sometimes. But this...this is daily. And intentional.

A few years ago, I read a lovely bio on Ruth Graham (Ruth: A Portrait by Patricia Cornwell). The one thing that I remember is that this busy mom of many had very little time for quiet time. So she left bibles open throughout her house. If she was passing by and had a moment, she would read. And go on refreshed.

In the presence of God is fullness of joy. But getting there, to the presence of God, that's the hard part. I'm putting in my 100 days. And I'm leaving open bibles and devotional books around the house. May He who is not silent, speak. May His presence fill this place. And may joy return.

A visit

Last post in 2009...Ok, so I'm not the most intrepid blogger. Here goes another try at it.

This evening we took the kids to a local Hospice House to visit my husband's aunt Lois. She's been ill for a while, and we thought she would pass away a few weeks ago. She's responded to treatment, so we are blessed to have a little more time with her.

I was back home, hanging out in the internet world a bit, when I realized how far removed my life feels from hers. She doesn't have internet. She doesn't have a computer. She still has a phone with a cord, and an answering machine.

And yet her life is connected. She's connected with people rather than artificial faces and designs that create so much of my world. She has at least 5 or more visitors a day. If I was in the hospital, I don't know if I'd have more than 2 or 3 (my husband and kids!).

She lives in a house in the country that she has lived in since she was a teenager. Some of the furniture has changed; much of it has not. I'm in my sixth home in 8 years of marriage. And I'm still in the phase of gathering furniture and such.

There's more I could say, but I guess what I notice the most is her ability to be connected with her community of neighbors and family, and her contentment in the place she has lived for so long.

I hope I can learn to do the same.